Canadian Politics Today

Beyond Politics => General Discussion => Topic started by: Queefer Sutherland on February 21, 2022, 10:06:47 pm

Title: Poetry culture
Post by: Queefer Sutherland on February 21, 2022, 10:06:47 pm
I'll start:

I've got nipples
Yes I do
I like to touch them
And so can you
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: Dia on February 22, 2022, 09:22:52 am
There's a weirdo in every crowd.
Sometimes they get too loud.
They change their name,
But not their game.
Working hard to increase their crude.
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: Queefer Sutherland on February 22, 2022, 02:00:00 pm
 I have a fan
Smiles are free
But to get my autograph
You'll pay a fee

I may be odd
But I'm no bore
Why so serious?
Like Tipper Gore
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: Michael Hardner on February 22, 2022, 02:19:15 pm
I'm Hardner Mike
My rhymes are liked
I'm sportsmanlike
My Peach Tea's spiked
 
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: Queefer Sutherland on February 22, 2022, 02:28:39 pm
H8ters gonna h8
Incels going to masturbate
Trump is reality show Hitler
Twice as evil as Bette Midler

Trudeau is a smug narcissist
Can a PM get more handsome than this?
Blackie blackface signals virtue
Opens his mouth, out comes the doo-doo

Andrew Scheer
Creepy grin
Erin O'Toole
Triple chin
Candace Bergin
Murphy's Law
Stephen Harper?
Super blah

Culture War, pick your side
All the newspapers have truth to hide
Culture War, choose your bubble
Destroy the West, walk through the rubble

This forum is all a bunch of whining
While Google Ad Sense does its data mining
Civility and privacy are RIP
All your base are belong to me
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: Michael Hardner on February 22, 2022, 03:54:15 pm
C'mon Squid...
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: Super Colin Blow on February 23, 2022, 04:30:20 am
On the chest of a barmaid from Sayle
Were tatooed all the prices of Ale
Whilst on her behind
for the sake of the blind
were precisely the same but in Braille
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: Michael Hardner on February 23, 2022, 08:18:15 am
I want to meet her.

Is she chubby ?
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: kimmy on February 24, 2022, 12:51:13 am
hey hey hey it's me it's the kay eye double emm why
if you see me postin here it means I'm probbly high
I get more pu$$y than any man ever seen
and I still party like it's 2019.

I love Mikaru like pastry loves filling
Mikey don't like movies that ain't set in office buildings.
Bubber M be list'nin to his crazy jazz tunes,
fifty gigs of bebop music fillin up his Zune.

I'm always down with Coonlight but you know he ain't really black.
I always razz the waldo because Justin's really wack.

wilber and Squidward they've got a million famous watches,
cybercoma he be sippin on them super high end Scotches.

Super Colin Blow he be a Yankee but he post here anyway,
talkin bout the books he reading and the music that he play.

Here's a shout out to our friend the segnosaurus
he walk softly and he carry a thesaurus.

eyeball he live on a boat, he live the life aquatic.
maybe someday he set sail for islands temperate and exotic.

waldo mad at Sqiddy cuz he a moji-con abuser
I feel sad for Dia cuz she drive a PT Cruiser.

What is the dumb tag anyway,
is it brick or empty box?
I think better pour myself
another bourbon on the rocks.

Black Dog and the Shade Man wave their dicks up in the air,
BC Cheque be stressing, she be pullin' out her hair.

Remember Timmy G and Argus,
and Pete F and msj and Goddess.
And Jimmy T from Waterhen who run the general store.
I miss our friends who don't come round here and post here anymore.

World War Three is happnin and we still dealin with the plague
The future seems uncertain but evrything seems vague.

Every day more bad news,
fires plagues floods and freedom trucks.
The news it is depressing
and the outlook surely sucks.

Right now it seem like evrything is goin down the chute.
But in these darkest times remember: We. Are. Groot.



 -k
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: Michael Hardner on February 24, 2022, 05:28:13 am
Didn't get the last line, but still winner 🏆
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: kimmy on February 24, 2022, 11:20:13 pm
Didn't get the last line

hmm, I wonder why that might be.

Mikey don't like movies that ain't set in office buildings

Oh yeah, that must be it.

 -k
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: Michael Hardner on February 25, 2022, 06:14:56 am
Why do you hate me.

Ok, looked it up...

Goddam what am I missing... Talking racoons and a living little haypile ?!?



https://youtu.be/RMdIx228dBw
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: kimmy on March 04, 2022, 12:51:46 am
Why do you hate me.

Ok, looked it up...

Goddam what am I missing... Talking racoons and a living little haypile ?!?

You know, Michael, it wouldn't kill you to actually you know, watch the movie. I feel like an aspiring comedian needs to have some basic level of cultural literacy, and if you don't know "I am Groot" in 2022, I'm not sure you qualify. I feel like if this was 1983 you'd be wandering around saying "I keep hearing about this guy in the black mask with the heavy breathing. What's that about?"

Here's what you do. Take two hours off from doom-scrolling about WW3 and pandemics and trucks. Put the kids to bed. Grab Joan. Smoke a big bowl of the dankest chiba-chiba. Tell Joan you're doing "research" for some comedy bits, if she asks. Watch Guardians Of The Galaxy, the 2014 one.  Instead of feeling worse, as would after reading Black Dog and Shady for 2 hours, you will feel better, if only for a while. Thank me later.

 -k
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: Michael Hardner on March 04, 2022, 08:08:11 am
1. You know, Michael, it wouldn't kill you to actually you know, watch the movie. I feel like an aspiring comedian needs to have some basic level of cultural literacy, and if you don't know "I am Groot" in 2022, I'm not sure you qualify. I feel like if this was 1983 you'd be wandering around saying "I keep hearing about this guy in the black mask with the heavy breathing. What's that about?"

2. Here's what you do. Take two hours off from doom-scrolling about WW3 and pandemics and trucks. Put the kids to bed. Grab Joan. Smoke a big bowl of the dankest chiba-chiba. Tell Joan you're doing "research" for some comedy bits, if she asks. Watch Guardians Of The Galaxy, the 2014 one.  Instead of feeling worse, as would after reading Black Dog and Shady for 2 hours, you will feel better, if only for a while. Thank me later.

 -k
1. You know Kimmy.  There is a VERY SMALL group of people on this earth that can force me to watch something that every molecule of my sad balls tell me to not watch.  But, since I named my 2nd born after you, you actually are in this select group.
2. I like the grab Joan part.  Actually I like all of it.  Conveniently we have Disney for one month to watch The Beatles.  Love ya.
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: Queefer Sutherland on March 07, 2022, 01:12:54 am
2 long years of COVID
I've got the blues
Long winter doing nothing
I've got the blues

Banging my head on the drywall
I've got the blues
Patch the holes just to find something to do
I've got the blues

Doom-scrolling all day on twitter
I've got the blues
Forgot what humans look like
I've got the blues

Forgot how to drive my car cuz its rusting in the garage
I've got the blues
Still pay for my car insurance
I've got the blues

Michael Hardner has been my best friend the last 2 years
I've got the blues
Started to think Shady's kinda funny
I've got the blues

Vaccines were supposed to stop the lockdowns
I've got the blues
Bought a new 4K TV from Bestbuy
Still got the blues

Subscribed to every streaming tv service
I've got the blues
How many skanks have been on The Bachelor?
I've got the blues

#TeamEdward is the new Batman
I've got the blues
Maybe #TeamJacob can be The Joker?
I've got the blues

Even though my days are rainy
MH I still have you
Title: Re: Poetry culture
Post by: Michael Hardner on March 07, 2022, 08:11:56 am
I love you nipples...