Everyone I know who feared their parents does not have a good relationship with them as an adult.
In my case, guilty as charged. But I have to believe that there's some kind of a happy medium.
There are other ways to set boundaries and exert authority than violence and anyone who think the world is eff-ed up because we don't smack our children enough is an idiot who has no idea what parenting is about.
When this topic comes along it seems like people always end up talking about two extremes-- the tyrants whose children live in fear, or the spineless ones whose children are completely out of control. I think most parents fit somewhere in the middle. I don't think most children live in fear of their parents, even those who have very strict parents.
-k