Author Topic: Personal Stuff  (Read 18237 times)

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Offline MH

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #720 on: April 18, 2019, 06:38:11 am »
Hmmm.... the work change doesn't sound too bad to me.

Oddly, I am starting to realize that the situation I have been trying to get OUT of at work may be better than the one I'm trying to get in to.  This comes after talking to the managers about how confused and demoralizing their leadership is.

Even though my client (let's call her Mindy Chang) is a task master and is not interested in new ways of managing, in general, she does listen to me.  And she really wants me to stay so I have been sneaking in said "new ways" and they're working.  (Side note - Mindy has an adorable accent and is 6 feet tall.  I have two 6 feet tall Asian women in my life.  I pride myself on valuing them as professionals even as I quiver inside).

So I had to tell Mindy that I am taking 6 weeks paid leave this summer to be with Joan and baby and since it's between our deliverables she didn't bat an eye.  I think the only think I need to do is get a $20K raise and I'm in my dream job.  I might be able to get $10K.

-------------

On the home front, I got Joan to drive me to work the other day because the subway was down then suggested she just drop in to the doctor's office that's right near my work.  She's been depressed lately, and it's getting bad :( Our doctor phoned me a little white later saying that Joan has severe postpartem and we have to take it seriously. :(

So it's day by day ... but we're also moving next week so it's not a great time no sir.

Offline wilber

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #721 on: April 18, 2019, 07:42:34 pm »
Hmmm.... the work change doesn't sound too bad to me.

Oddly, I am starting to realize that the situation I have been trying to get OUT of at work may be better than the one I'm trying to get in to.  This comes after talking to the managers about how confused and demoralizing their leadership is.

Even though my client (let's call her Mindy Chang) is a task master and is not interested in new ways of managing, in general, she does listen to me.  And she really wants me to stay so I have been sneaking in said "new ways" and they're working.  (Side note - Mindy has an adorable accent and is 6 feet tall.  I have two 6 feet tall Asian women in my life.  I pride myself on valuing them as professionals even as I quiver inside).

So I had to tell Mindy that I am taking 6 weeks paid leave this summer to be with Joan and baby and since it's between our deliverables she didn't bat an eye.  I think the only think I need to do is get a $20K raise and I'm in my dream job.  I might be able to get $10K.

-------------

On the home front, I got Joan to drive me to work the other day because the subway was down then suggested she just drop in to the doctor's office that's right near my work.  She's been depressed lately, and it's getting bad :( Our doctor phoned me a little white later saying that Joan has severe postpartem and we have to take it seriously. :(

So it's day by day ... but we're also moving next week so it's not a great time no sir.

Sounds like you have a lot on your plate, look after each other and you will survive. Years ago I got home from a trip at 7 AM to find that my wife was in hospital having twins by caesarean, our dog had been poisoned and we were moving into a new home that day after moving back from YYZ. We just celebrated our 50th anniversary last month.
"Never trust a man without a single redeeming vice" WSC
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Offline kimmy

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #722 on: April 19, 2019, 05:14:14 am »
Hmmm.... the work change doesn't sound too bad to me.

It's pretty good. And yet being moved out of a supervisory position kind of feels like a demotion, since I don't have anybody reporting to me anymore. I've moved from the top of the Minion totem pole and am now at the bottom of the Smart-People totem pole. It's a better totem pole, but I've gone from the top to the bottom and while I like this work better it still sort of feels like a loss of status.  But it's a good move for me, and I feel like it's recognition that I can do a lot more than they anticipated when they hired me.   I also have to learn a lot.  I need to learn about quality process and regulatory stuff. 

Oddly, I am starting to realize that the situation I have been trying to get OUT of at work may be better than the one I'm trying to get in to.  This comes after talking to the managers about how confused and demoralizing their leadership is.

Even though my client (let's call her Mindy Chang) is a task master and is not interested in new ways of managing, in general, she does listen to me.  And she really wants me to stay so I have been sneaking in said "new ways" and they're working. 

Yay!  That sounds positive.

(Side note - Mindy has an adorable accent and is 6 feet tall.  I have two 6 feet tall Asian women in my life.  I pride myself on valuing them as professionals even as I quiver inside).

Mikaru!

So I had to tell Mindy that I am taking 6 weeks paid leave this summer to be with Joan and baby and since it's between our deliverables she didn't bat an eye.  I think the only think I need to do is get a $20K raise and I'm in my dream job.  I might be able to get $10K.

-------------

On the home front, I got Joan to drive me to work the other day because the subway was down then suggested she just drop in to the doctor's office that's right near my work.  She's been depressed lately, and it's getting bad :( Our doctor phoned me a little white later saying that Joan has severe postpartem and we have to take it seriously. :(

So it's day by day ... but we're also moving next week so it's not a great time no sir.

This is heartbreaking to hear.  I hope things improve. On the bright side at least you and she are both on top of it, and understanding what you're up against and being able to reach out for help is a big part of the fight.   I think I've mentioned that I've struggled with depression at times in my life, and not knowing what was wrong and not knowing how to get help was probably the hardest part.  I'm very sorry that you and she are going through this.


 -k
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Offline MH

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #723 on: April 19, 2019, 07:24:58 am »
It's pretty good. And yet being moved out of a supervisory position kind of feels like a demotion, since I don't have anybody reporting to me anymore. I've moved from the top of the Minion totem pole and am now at the bottom of the Smart-People totem pole. It's a better totem pole, but I've gone from the top to the bottom and while I like this work better it still sort of feels like a loss of status.  But it's a good move for me, and I feel like it's recognition that I can do a lot more than they anticipated when they hired me.   I also have to learn a lot.  I need to learn about quality process and regulatory stuff. 

I get it and have been there.  You can ask yourself "loss of status to whom ?".  Likely to people you don't care about right ?

The point is, they didn't want to lose you so they put you with the smarties.
 
Quote
This is heartbreaking to hear.  I hope things improve. On the bright side at least you and she are both on top of it, and understanding what you're up against and being able to reach out for help is a big part of the fight.   I think I've mentioned that I've struggled with depression at times in my life, and not knowing what was wrong and not knowing how to get help was probably the hardest part.  I'm very sorry that you and she are going through this.

Our doctor (we have the same doctor) asked me to come in with her and it seems she (the doctor) was trying to convey that Joan had related some seriously dark thoughts to her.  That hit hard, but I was also not surprised somehow.  So now we're on track to do something we never thought we would - have her on antidepressant medication.  There are alternatives but the medication takes so long to kick in (4 months) that we have to start it now in case other things don't work.

Oh, did I mention we're moving next week ?     :P

Offline ?Impact

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #724 on: April 20, 2019, 02:18:58 pm »
Years ago I got home from a trip at 7 AM to find that my wife was in hospital having twins by caesarean
...
We just celebrated our 50th anniversary last month.

I had to reread the first part, I thought you had said "A year ago..."

Offline MH

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #725 on: April 29, 2019, 06:21:20 am »
Posting from my own home  :o

Offline Bubbermiley

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #726 on: April 29, 2019, 08:23:23 am »
Oh look! Carpenter ants!

Sorry. Just reliving when I first moved into my house with a little baby.
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Offline MH

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #727 on: April 29, 2019, 08:50:31 am »
Oh look! Carpenter ants!

Sorry. Just reliving when I first moved into my house with a little baby.

Thanks 😊

Offline the_squid

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #728 on: April 29, 2019, 01:15:43 pm »
Iím re-doing the back patio...   rolling on some grippy **** over the concrete.  Or will once I find the goddamn paint roller!  I know i have one.....    >:(
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Offline cybercoma

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #729 on: April 29, 2019, 03:38:46 pm »
Iím re-doing the back patio...   rolling on some grippy **** over the concrete.  Or will once I find the goddamn paint roller!  I know i have one.....    >:(
Is this code for sex things?
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Offline the_squid

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #730 on: April 29, 2019, 03:44:00 pm »
Is this code for sex things?

I donít think so.....   but I did find my paint roller.
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Offline JMT

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #731 on: April 29, 2019, 04:05:00 pm »
So, there's this girl - she's crazy about me, and has been for months.  The problem is that she's 18.  That's a big age gap, and it's made me very hesitant, especially considering what happened with the girl who was my now 22 year old fiancee (funny story about that at the end).

A week ago, she was out drinking with some friends.  One of the girls got behind the wheel, intoxicated.  The were driving far too fast down a gravel road, and rolled end over end multiple times.  The girl (the one who really likes me) wasn't wearing a seat-belt, and was ejected from the vehicle.  She was airlifted to Winnipeg and wasn't expected to survive due to a traumatic brain injury.  Surprisingly, other than that and a fractured vertebrae, she had barely a scratch on her. 

She's recovered much faster than expected.  Within two days they were able to take her out of the protective coma.  They won't need to due surgery, as the brain bleed has mostly stopped on its own and they believe it will stop.  She knows people and facts and general dates, and is becoming more herself every day.  I went to see her yesterday.  She can't yet stay awake that long, but yesterday was the best that she's been.  I asked her at the beginning if she knew who I was - she said she did, but couldn't tell me my name.  I left for a bit and came back.  I asked if she figured out who I was yet.  She told me yeah, you're John Taylor, and that's why I'm nervous and shy.  The nurse in the ICU asked if I was her boyfriend - I told her that I was just a friend.  Then the girl said (not realizing it was me sitting there) that she had a boyfriend, but he didn't want her - she was referring to me, and my hesitance over this.  Assuming she's going to make a full recovery, or most of one, I'm torn on what to do at this point.  Her family really likes me.  She really likes me.  My own family is far more hesitant because of my last relationship.

Speaking of my ex - I don't speak to her anymore.  I haven't in months.  She got her sister to call me, and tell me how much she regretted what she did, and that she realized she needed me in her life.  It didn't take long to realize that nothing had changed or ever would.  Last week she had her mom message me for the same reason.  I'm not even responding to that anymore.  I went back on Prozac to help with my obsessive tendencies, and it's helped me to fully get over her.  Now that I don't want her though, she can't seem to leave me alone.  Eventually I hope that she will. 
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Offline Pinus or Vid or...?????

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #732 on: April 29, 2019, 05:28:47 pm »
If I were you, I would hook up with her.  We only live once after all.  Do you have a pic of her?

PS...I am moving to the interlake next month.  What is Waterhen like?  It would be two hours away from where I will be
« Last Edit: April 29, 2019, 05:31:07 pm by Vid »
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Offline Bubbermiley

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #733 on: April 29, 2019, 06:08:31 pm »
I just got back from 4 days of teenage dance competitions in Regina. Drove straight through. It was kind of fun, kind of grueling. Now I guess I have to watch Game of Thrones.
« Last Edit: April 29, 2019, 07:04:29 pm by Bubbermiley »

Offline the_squid

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Re: Personal Stuff
« Reply #734 on: April 29, 2019, 06:13:20 pm »
JMT - take it slow.  No need to rush things....   and girls with multiple injuries stuck in hospital beds probably shouldnít be dating anyone.
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