Author Topic: Attraction Culture  (Read 437 times)

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Offline Mr. Perfect

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Re: Attraction Culture
« Reply #15 on: August 13, 2021, 10:05:27 am »
What was the 2nd one arrested for?   Looks like a mugshot.

Offline MH

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Re: Attraction Culture
« Reply #16 on: August 13, 2021, 10:50:32 am »
They're actors

Offline Mr. Perfect

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Re: Attraction Culture
« Reply #17 on: August 13, 2021, 02:24:22 pm »
They're actors

So’s this guy…


Offline BC_cheque

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Re: Attraction Culture
« Reply #18 on: August 13, 2021, 02:51:50 pm »
This is what I pictured you as, but a little less femme


I always envisioned her to look like Rhonda Rhousey.
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Offline kimmy

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Re: Attraction Culture
« Reply #19 on: August 15, 2021, 09:46:44 pm »
This is what I pictured you as, but a little less femme



Maybe this



I always envisioned her to look like Rhonda Rhousey.

Truthfully, closer to a less-cheerful Amy Poehler.



 -k
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Offline kimmy

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Re: Attraction Culture
« Reply #20 on: August 16, 2021, 12:02:47 am »
A while back when Linzy and I were fighting and we were "taking a break" I went to one of my favorite bars. Standing outside the door was this beautiful woman. I was reminded of the scene in "Firefly" when Kaylee first meets Shepherd Book.  "You're not looking at the destination, you're looking at the ships. And mine's the nicest," she says to him. She brought me inside and sat me at the bar. I was her first customer of the day, as she had just opened a few minutes earlier. We got to talking. I told her that my little brother had just been diagnosed with cancer and that I was having a big fight with my girlfriend. We had what felt like was a really intense personal talk.

I became somewhat... obsessed with her.  She-- let's call her Lisa-- was so close to my ideal crush.  Tall, slim, beautiful, charismatic. She has blue eyes, hair the color of liquid honey, small breasts, long legs, a graceful bohemian sense of style that is right up my alley... she was more or less my dream girl.  I felt pretty much the same giddy excitement when I met her as I felt when I first met Lindsey. I could hardly stop thinking about her. I felt like she was just as into me. But I'm self-aware enough to know that I think pretty much everybody is into me, so I was able to remind myself that I didn't know for sure that Lisa was into me, or even into women at all.

I went back multiple times over the next week, hoping to see her again. She was there a couple of times. We talked more. I updated her on my brother. We talked more about each other's stories. We talked about lots of things. I felt like we had this deep connection.

Lisa has this aura. All the other women there-- waitresses and bartenders and hostesses-- go talk to her at every chance they have. Fashion advice, philosophical advice, general chit-chat, whatever, they're all just drawn to Lisa. She has this quality that just draws people in. She is magnetic.

Lindsey and I patched things up. We had lots of sex. We went out for drinks to celebrate. Lisa was there. She was a consummate host, as you'd expect. The next time I saw Lisa things seemed very different.  She seemed cold, aloof.  That earlier connection I felt seemed to have vanished.  She hardly talked to me at all.  One of the waitresses brought me a spoon to go with my appetizer, Lisa grabbed the spoon, mentioned that it hadn't been polished, and then never brought me another spoon. There was an uncomfortable level of weirdness to it all.

I felt like once Lisa realized that when I said "girlfriend" I meant an actual intimate partner as opposed to a platonic friend, everything changed. "Girlfriend" is a very ambiguous term, because people use it to mean two different things. Maybe at first when I said me and my girlfriend were having a big fight, she thought that me and Linz were besties having a spat, but once she saw us together she understood that me and Linz weren't besties, we're a couple.

There's another bartender there, let's call her Kelly. Kelly and I talk a lot about fitness stuff. She's very buff and obviously spends a lot of time working out and so (real recognizing real etc) she and I ended up chatting a lot. Lisa comes over, tells Kelly to get over to the tables, and resumes providing the same kind of passive-aggressive service.

Last week I was there and I overheard Lisa and Kelly talking about Lisa trying to plan a date, and my heart skipped a beat when I heard Lisa refer to her date as "she". She was anxious and nervous. Her date wanted her to take her to a place where Lisa's friends worked, and Lisa was uncomfortable with the idea. I was giddy with excitement. Even though me and Lindsey are back together for the time being, it made my heart pound to know that Lisa is into women. It was thrilling to think that the initial magnetism I had felt between us might have been genuine attraction from her side as well as from my side.  It was exciting to think that all the weird passive aggressive behavior she exhibited toward me after she saw me and Linz together might have been jealousy.

Anyway: a while back I read this article that made me think of all of these strange and intense feelings I had toward Lisa. There is a word for it.
Limerence!   When you start planning your schedule around the hope of meeting this person you hardly know? When you find yourself spending your spare brain cycles thinking about this person you hardly know? When you find yourself fantasizing about a better life centered around this person you hardly know? That's limerence.

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2021/feb/13/when-you-cant-quit-a-crush

Reading about this has made me feel less stupid for feeling these intense feelings towards a complete stranger.

 -k
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Offline Mr. Perfect

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Re: Attraction Culture
« Reply #21 on: August 16, 2021, 02:37:58 pm »

Offline MH

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Re: Attraction Culture
« Reply #22 on: August 16, 2021, 02:55:34 pm »
I think that I still get infatuated from time to time but it's just a fantasy to me.  Good luck 🍀

Offline Bubbermiley

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Re: Attraction Culture
« Reply #23 on: August 19, 2021, 10:26:29 am »
Speaking of attraction, some people are so ugly deep within that it seeps out of their pores.
https://twitter.com/kirkacevedo/status/1428163255847903235?s=19

Offline Gorgeous Graham

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Re: Attraction Culture
« Reply #24 on: August 19, 2021, 05:04:17 pm »
Lindsey and I patched things up. We had lots of sex. We went out for drinks to celebrate. Lisa was there. She was a consummate host, as you'd expect. The next time I saw Lisa things seemed very different.  She seemed cold, aloof.  That earlier connection I felt seemed to have vanished.  She hardly talked to me at all.  One of the waitresses brought me a spoon to go with my appetizer, Lisa grabbed the spoon, mentioned that it hadn't been polished, and then never brought me another spoon. There was an uncomfortable level of weirdness to it all.

I felt like once Lisa realized that when I said "girlfriend" I meant an actual intimate partner as opposed to a platonic friend, everything changed. "Girlfriend" is a very ambiguous term, because people use it to mean two different things. Maybe at first when I said me and my girlfriend were having a big fight, she thought that me and Linz were besties having a spat, but once she saw us together she understood that me and Linz weren't besties, we're a couple.

Last week I was there and I overheard Lisa and Kelly talking about Lisa trying to plan a date, and my heart skipped a beat when I heard Lisa refer to her date as "she". She was anxious and nervous.

Lisa very likely wants you.  Choose wisely.
I can tell how good of a person you are by how you treat the people you disagree with.
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Offline waldo

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Re: Attraction Culture
« Reply #25 on: August 21, 2021, 02:56:10 pm »
Speaking of attraction, some people are so ugly deep within that it seeps out of their pores.   https://twitter.com/kirkacevedo/status/1428163255847903235?s=19

from one of the better parody accounts on twitter: